As we started going through Michelle’s wardrobe, she pulled out item after item that she wears frequently and that still fits.  One of the things Michelle was most proud of about her wardrobe is that she takes good care of her clothes and keeps them for a long time.  She has typically been a classic dresser – she has lots of navy blue and black trousers, button down shirts, a few patterned vests, simple sweaters and cardigans (she tends to run cold), and a selection of jackets (mostly in neutral tones with a hint of color here or there).

She smiled proudly and then sat down on the bed with a sigh.  “So,” she said, “Why am I so frustrated every time I get dressed?”

What a perfect question!  She had called me for help, so obviously something was feeling out of sorts for her.  She admitted that she had tried and tried to figure it out on her own, but in the end she just felt like she was spending more money buying the same clothes and not feeling any better.  As a result, instead of 3 pairs of black pants she had 6 and instead of 9 button-down blouses she had 14 (mostly white!).

Classic Gone Awry

Can you have too much of a good thing?  When it comes to fashion, absolutely!  A few polka dots are fun.  Polka dots on everything are overpowering.  You might like red, but wearing a red pantsuit, red shoes and a red necklace (let’s not even think about a red handbag on top of all that) and you could end up looking like a walking popsicle (not usually someone’s major objective when she gets dressed).

The same thing is true for a classic wardrobe.  Having the basics that you can mix and match with ease is fabulous.  Wearing everything in black, beige and navy and few, if any, prints or interesting details is just downright dull, as Michelle and many others can attest.

You have no idea how many times I’ve asked women to tell me how they feel about outfit after outfit in their wardrobes only to have them say, it’s okay or fine every time.  No, no, no…please say it isn’t so.  This is a sure sign their wardrobe wins points for being functional but not much else!

Your wardrobe is a direct reflection of who you are – a beautiful expression of all that makes you you – and that’s where so many women get lost.

I am not, in any way, belittling a classic wardrobe or style.  The problem arises when the classic pieces turn dull, inflexible or frumpy.  A classic style might be the mainstay of your wardrobe but what about the rest of you?  How do you reflect that quietly radiant, luminous, colorful or sassy part of you?

Are you suffering from classic-itis? You are if:

1. You’re bored. The World Dictionary defines classic as: “characterized by simplicity, balance, regularity, and purity of form.”  Being sure you have the basics covered in your wardrobe is critical.  But if that’s all there is, your eyes glaze over and you feel like you blend in to the woodwork.  Yes, you want to have the basics – a beautiful cardigan you can easily toss on over a sleeveless top or pretty dress…a fitted blazer you can wear when you’re called away to meet with a client or going to a networking meeting…a great pair of pumps and knee high boots, etc.  But, don’t get carried away.  It’s your personality that makes your wardrobe interesting, so be absolutely positive your personality shines through!
2. You’re color-deprived. The point of something being classic and basic is that you can wear it with a lot of things.  So, it stands to reason that most of these items will be in neutral colors (your best neutral colors, right?).  But, for instance, when we surveyed Michelle’s wardrobe, what do you think we saw?  Yup, a sea of black, navy and white (with a smattering of taupe thrown in).  Egads…no wonder she’s bored!  (Adding color doesn’t mean you have to go for fluorescent pink to make a statement.  Chances are if you are drawn to a classic style that you will wear your colors in a way that is more understated and not the least bit overpowering.  Depending on your natural coloring you might look amazing in eggplant, a beautiful wine tone, periwinkle, forest green or a delicious teal.  Wearing your best colors will bring out the best of you.)
3. Your closet is overflowing. More often than not, the career classic dresser will keep buying things each season in an attempt to freshen things up.  As with Michelle, that often means adding more of what she already has.  Then, her closet gets filled to overflowing, she has no idea what’s really in there, and yet she’s bored.  It’s the classic…”closet full of clothes and nothing to wear” syndrome.

Making the Classics Work For You:

Here are a few tips to help you create a gorgeous, classic wardrobe with a twist:

1. Pat Yourself on the Back. Yes, you have mastered art of a basic wardrobe (not everyone has), so good for you!
2. Spice It Up! It’s absolutely critical that you add some of your personality into your wardrobe.  Otherwise you’ll find yourself sitting on your bed wondering what happened or seeing yourself in a photograph and wondering why you look so dreary.  That doesn’t mean you have to go super trendy.  It can mean adding a fabulous necklace that you adore; a jacket in a color that makes you sparkle; a cardigan with lace, ruffles, interesting buttons, rosettes, or an unusual shape; maybe a wide belt or an elegant pair of platform pumps…you get the idea – this is the very personal part of creating a signature wardrobe, and the options are endless.  The true delight is in allowing your beauty to shine through all those great basics!
3. Know When To Retire. The idea of a wardrobe is not to keep it for a million years.  No matter how well you take care of your clothes if you wear them enough they will wear out.  Yay!  That’s the idea.  Your lifestyle changes, your body changes and fashion changes – often not all at the same time!  Buy fabulous pieces that you love so much that you wear them over and over until it is embarrassing to be seen in public in them and then you can replace them. It’s a win-win.  You feel great every day and you get your money’s worth out of every article of clothing!

Some examples:

Accessories are a great way to add pizazz without feeling over the top.  Check these out:

	Often the default “classic” necklace is one or two gold chains. How about this fun twist on that classic look:
	Do you always carry the same basic handbag? How about shaking it up a bit with a red one? (If red is too big a leap (or not one of your colors), this handbag also comes in black, charcoal and white…or there are plenty of other fabulous handbags out other to choose from.)
	Or, how about a fun shoe in a deep color (it’s not black but it’s not screaming red either…understated elegance):

These are just the tip of the iceberg for ideas, and they certainly won’t speak to everyone.  But, if you want a great wardrobe, determine what that special quality is that makes you you and express it.

We know you have the classic thing down, right?  Now make it sing.  Rather than look like you stepped out a Talbots catalogue, for instance, how about using your Talbots basics and adding your personality to create a personal style and a wardrobe you delight in wearing.

If doing this on your own seems like a task of mythic proportions, then help is available.  We’ll cover all of this and much, much more at the Fashion Fairy Godmother weekend – Sept. 11-12 (www.fashionfairygodmotherprogram.com).

Register by September 6 and receive a $50 American Express Gift card so you can put all your new found ideas into practice and start your shopping off right after the workshop!

Can’t make the Fashion Fairy Godmother weekend, the next one-day Totally You workshop (http://www.totalimageconsultants.com/events.shtml#innerouter) is coming up on September 25.

Who do you see when you look in your closet? Is your mother’s face smiling back at you from that ruffle shirt you’ve never worn?  Or, is your best friend’s favorite dress hanging out in there taunting you?

Most often, in response to the question, “Who do you see when you look in your closet,” I hear:

• My mother
• My sister
• My best friend
• Myself, pre-children
• Myself, pre-30 extra pounds
• Myself, pre-menopause
• Whoever was working at the store the day I went shopping
• The store window mannequin…
• All of the above!

Is this true for you?  If so, what is the first feeling that comes to mind when you open your closet to get dressed? Exhaustion?  Overwhelm?  Denial?  Frustration?  Dread?  Some combination of all of these?  Rarely, under these circumstances, is it joy and delight.

Guess what?  When you look in your closet you want to see YOU…just you. That part of you that makes you smile, that reminds you of fun times and delicious memories (maybe the memories are of pushing your daughter on a swing, lunch with girlfriends, a successful business presentation, or a precious date with your sweetie – these are the simple pleasures that make up life).  You also want these feelings to be reflected in every aspect of your wardrobe down to your nightgown and slippers!

If you’re shaking your head in despair or frustration, you are not alone.  Most women will admit this is easier said than done.

So, let’s shake things up a bit.  Let’s begin to weed out those garments that make you roll your eyes or cringe.  They have absolutely no place in your wardrobe.

Evict the Strangers:

1. Remove one item from your closet that feels more like someone else than you. If you are near your closet go there right now and do this (if not, take a big piece of paper and write down the first thing that comes into your mind so you’ll remember to remove it later). Even if you don’t know why it isn’t you or what to put in to replace it…the very first step is to get it out of there.

As long as it is taking up space in your sacred closet (yes, this is where your essence is expressed every day!), you will feel over burdened, frustrated, annoyed, despairing or resigned to all of those feelings every time you get dressed, and none of that is good.

It is also very likely that you aren’t wearing those things anyway – it’s more like a security blanket but the security is a sham.

1. Identify one garment or outfit that makes you smile the second you put it on. It can be a dress, pair of pants and even a pair of shoes or scarf — no item is too small or insignificant.

Lay both of these garments side by side and have a piece of paper handy (your Nurturing Beauty Journal will do perfectly if you have your home study program “Who Taught You How To Dress?”)

For the outfit that isn’t you, write down everything about it you don’t like. Be as picky as you can be.  Maybe it’s the way the fabric feels?  Perhaps the buttons seem overwhelming or there are just too many of them?  It could be that you dislike the pattern or the way it clings or it has a belt and you don’t like belts.  Write down everything!  (If there are a few things you like about it, write those in a separate column.  Maybe the color is pretty if it weren’t so shapeless.)

For the outfit you love, write down everything you like about it. Color, texture, fit…maybe it makes you feel sophisticated, down-to-earth or pretty.  Whatever it is, write it down.

These lists are your lifeline the next time you go shopping.  Don’t leave home without them.  The next time you try on an outfit, run down both lists and compare the garment.

This exercise alone will help you stay focused when you shop. It is so easy to get distracted by all the choices, the lighting, or the helpful “advice” from sales women or your shopping buddies.

Sometimes, your desire to find “something” is so great that you settle for the best of what you find which often doesn’t really measure up to anything even close to fabulous – and that’s what you are shooting for!

Now, take a long, deep breath…this is just one step in creating a wardrobe you love.

How did this exercise make you feel?  Encouraged, hopeful, excited or like, yikes, now what!  If you feel like this is just the tip of the iceberg for you and you need a super jumpstart before you have to buy your Fall wardrobe, then I want to invite you to learn more about the upcoming Fashion Fairy Godmother workshop.

The Fashion Fairy Godmother workshop is a 2-day, action-packed workshop that will completely revamp how you shop, get dressed and change how you view your wardrobe and personal style forever!

“I haven’t felt this confident about my appearance in years!” This is what Kathy Wilk said after attending the Fashion Fairy Godmother retreat in the spring.

BONUS OFFER: As a very special extra bonus, when you are the first person to register by Monday, August 30, you will receive a $50 gift certificate to Jewelry by Karel (she will be there with her jewelry on Sunday when we’ll talk about how to accessorize using all the information you’ve learned the previous day).  Get this special bonus right here: www.fashionfairygodmotherprogram.com

MORE BONUSES: When you are either the second or third person to register by Monday, August 30, you will receive a $25 gift certificate to Jewelry by Karel. Believe me, this is one of the most treasured bonuses (and you’ll see why when you’re there!).

If you are not sure if the Fashion Fairy Godmother workshop is for you or just what the next best step is for you overall, simply fill out my “I Need Help” form (http://www.totalimageconsultants.com/i-need-help.shtml), and we’ll set up a complimentary ‘Discover Your Style’ phone consultation.

Whatever you decide to do, now is the perfect time…before you are perusing your Fall wardrobe and wondering what you can possibly wear to get you through the next 6 months!  Imagine instead feeling empowered and joyful about the transition!

I have a new favorite book I want to share with you.  It’s called “Creating a Charmed Life” by Victoria Moran.

I met Victoria this past spring when we both spoke at the Vibrant Life Expo in Newburyport, Massachusetts.  Unfortunately, I missed hearing her speak but I did have a chance to peek at (and later read) her books (she’s a prolific writer) and talk with her briefly – and we’ve kept the conversation going since then.

The idea of creating a charmed life is compelling.  I mean, who wouldn’t want a life like that? As I have gotten older (and dare I say wiser (at least when it comes to recognizing what makes my heart sing)), I have been all about simplifying, incorporating more and more beauty into my life, and creating as much peace and joy as I can.  I admit it takes commitment and persistence (and regular reminders), but the rewards are great.

So much of Victoria’s book rings true, and the concepts are similar to those I address with my clients when it comes to their wardrobes and personal style.  The truth is that we get dressed every day (sometimes more than once), so why not have that experience be mindful, joyful, and beautiful…at least most of the time!

I want to share a short passage from the section entitled “Install Necessary Upgrade” –

“You can upgrade every aspect of your life without a lot of money and with no more time than you’re spending now.  Essential elements of upgraded living include these: Unique is usually better than commonplace. Handmade is usually better than mass-produced.  Beautiful is usually better than ugly and always better than neutral.  Engaging beats dull, hands down.  You can start your upgrade process with the simplest of discernments, choosing something that’s just a bit delightful over something that isn’t.” Yes!

If you read my article from last week “My Fashion Dilemma: the dress or the skirt” you know that these are concepts I recommend and do my best to adhere to because I know it always pays off!

Wouldn’t you like to know more about how to age exquisitely, grow through the hard times, redefine “lady,” and razzle-dazzle on occasion?  These are just a hint of the wise, useful, and heartfelt wisdom Victoria imparts in “Creating a Charmed Life.”  As the subtitle says…these are “sensible, spiritual secrets every busy woman should know,” and I couldn’t agree more.

Give yourself a $10 gift that can have a million dollar impact on your life: Creating a Charmed Life: Sensible, Spiritual Secrets Every Busy Woman Should Know

Want to learn more about Victoria Moran.  You can find her here: http://www.victoriamoran.com/

VERY SPECIAL OFFER: I will be a guest speaker on Victoria’s teleclass on Tuesday, August 24 at 8:30-10:00 pm (eastern).  The class “Come Into Your Own in 2010″ is a year-long class that started earlier this year.  She has, however, graciously offered to have any of my readers join us at no cost.  Simply call 760-569-9000; access code 851309# where Victoria and I will be talking about all things fashion related including (possibly): what are the biggest mistakes women make; why is clothing important; what about people who think it’s not important; why vegan; can you be vegan and still fashionable; what about grooming and skin care; what are you favorite product lines…you get the idea!

Want to learn more about how to “upgrade” your wardrobe and personal style? Check out my upcoming Fashion Fairy Godmother program (www.fashionfairygodmotherprogram.com) or fill out my “I Need Help” form (http://totalimageconsultants.com/i-need-help.shtml) and start the upgrade journey right away!

As the temperatures rise, the needs of your skin change.  We’re not only talking sun protection, although that is certainly an important component, we’re also thinking about what your skin needs to adjust and be safe and happy in the warmer temperatures.  Here are a few basic tips:

• The Sun & Oily Skin — If you have oily skin resist the temptation to over scrub your skin to control oil and shine.  Over rubbing your skin will only stimulate the sebaceous glands and actually create the very condition you’re trying to avoid, i.e., excessively oily skin (not to mention that it can cause more severe breakouts).  It can be helpful to choose products that contain algae which detoxifies your skin and helps to control the oil.

• Don’t be lured by the drying effects of the sun. Although it might initially feel like the sun is drying up the oil and clearing up your skin, it actually thickens the skin (hyperkeratosis) blocking your pores and leading to more intense breakouts shortly down the road.  The reprieve is very short-lived! If you are taking antibiotics to control acne, beware that it also causes sun sensitivity so applying a sunscreen is critical.

• Sensitive Skin — If you have sensitive skin stay out of the sun as much as possible, always (that means every day even if you are not planning to spend prolonged time in the sun) protect your skin from the sun when you are outside (preferably with active ingredients titanium dioxide and zinc oxide), and choose skin care products designed for sensitive skin.

• Mature Skin — Choose your Age Management skincare routine wisely.  If keeping a youthful appearance is your ultimate goal (and for most of us over 30 it is!), be careful what you use during the summer months.  Alpha hydroxy acids, which many people use daily or as a special facial treatment, make your skin ultra-sensitive to the damaging effects of the sun.  In other words, AHA’s will not only make you burn more easily (and you’re burning more virgin skin!), but they make you more susceptible to hyperpigmentation (sun spots) which is what you are trying to avoid or diminish by using them in the first place.  If you continue to use Alpha Hydroxy Acids in the summer, apply them at night and be diligent (I’m not kidding!) about sun protection.  If you don’t, you’re wasting your money and run the risk of further damaging your skin.  Ditto for Retin-A users.

• Sun Protection –  It seems that sun protection has become a complicated issue.  When to apply, how much to apply, what number to apply, when to reapply!  Yikes!  It can make you crazy.  So, let me give you a few tips to demystify it:
  • Bigger doesn’t necessarily mean better. There is very little difference between the protection in an SPF 30 and SPF 45 or higher and it often gives people a false sense of security about reapplying.  Yes, no matter what number you use you need to reapply if you are out in the sun for any length of time beyond running errands.
  • Be sure it protects for UVA as well as UVB – it has to say so on the bottle (the SPF factor only applies to UVB rays).
  • Not all sun exposure is “bad!” Yes, apply sunscreen to your face and chest every day but leave your arms free from sunscreen several times a week while you are out in the sun for 15-20 minutes.  Your body needs Vitamin D and the most natural source is the sun.

Although each person’s skin is different and has individualized needs, these are a few basic (very basic) guidelines to follow through the summer months.  Having had acne when I was a teenager I understand the confusion out there around what to use to take good care of your skin.

Good skin care habits do make a difference in the look and health of your skin and since we look at our face every day it often directly impacts our self-esteem and self-confidence.  The better care you take of your skin the happier you’ll be when you look in the mirror.

Need more skin care guidance? For those of you who are in the Boston area, come to my monthly seminar this Tuesday (August 17).  It’s only $20, and the topic will be skin care! http://totalimageconsultants.com/events.shtml#monthly

Recently, I stopped into one of my favorite stores – the Studio in Brookline, MA to pick up something they were holding for me.  Shopping in July is nothing short of hit or miss (often more miss than hit), but they had some inviting sales going on throughout the store, so I had to take a peek.

Our summer has been unseasonably hot, hot, hot!  Very little rain, temperatures topping 90 and humidity hovering around the miserable level.  As a result, my sleeveless tops haven’t seen this much action in at least 5 years.

It also makes wearing pants rather unappealing, so one of the things I have been looking for is more casual skirts. The fashion world, however, has had other ideas, and the pickings (overall) were slim.  Dresses, yes…skirts, not so much.  (The Studio actually had one of the best selections of skirts of any store this past spring.)

As I perused the racks, I thought I’d see what (if anything) they had left for cute skirts.  Two items caught my eye right away. One was a green/yellow/brown jersey skirt.  The other was a dressy dress.  Ooops, not what I was looking for, but hey, there it was.  It was a gorgeous ombré (gradation of color from dark to light) design of blue floating down into a shimmery taupe.  I was intrigued enough to try both on.

The skirt was nice but the dress was amazing!  My first thought was, “Well, the skirt is practical and the dress isn’t.  It’s also comfortable and a great price…”

Then, I asked myself the most critical (and revealing) question of all, “Do I love the skirt?  Am I excited to wear it?”

The answer was a resounding NO!  Practical, yes.  Comfortable, yes.  Great price, yes.  Fabulous…no!

In my heart I knew that if I got it, it would be okay.  But, as I tell all my clients, okay is never good enough! Do that often enough and you end up with a ho-hum wardrobe (one of the reasons many women come to me in the first place).  It’s a slippery slope so you have to be vigilant.

The dress, on the other hand, made me smile.  It felt great (very comfortable), was a great price, and I felt like Grace Kelly wearing it!  I admit I even had to squelch the urge to wear it home.

Yes, I have no occasion to wear it right now.  But, there are two things I tell all my clients:

1. When you find a dressy outfit you love, buy it – even if you have no dressy event on your calendar!  If you wait until you need something, you can’t always find what you want and often end up settling for something second rate.
2. If you buy it, the universe will eventually reward you with an occasion to wear it. (Or, as I talk about in Chapter 7 of “Who Taught You How To Dress?” – there are all kinds of creative ways to wear something you are saving.)

So, what do you think is hanging in my closet now?  That’s right!  The dress, and I know I’ll be wearing it before too long and will feel great.

Do I miss the skirt?  I miss the idea of a skirt but I don’t miss that particular skirt.  I’ll just keep looking.  I learned first hand a long time ago that it is never worth it to settle for something you don’t love.

Have you had a similar shopping experience?  If so, which choice did you make and how has it worked out (or not) for you?